Marc Andre Fleury + The Light That Shines When Things End

ptolemaea — ethel cain i am the face of love's rage

(special thanks to @celbrini for brainstorming with me)

what's poetry like by bianca stone

hi mikko. mikko's tongue.

wpg@dal 05.17.25 | round 2 game 6

is that a halo or a target on your back

something i find really interesting about will is how he's so extremely conscious about the fact that he's really goddamn young in the grand scheme of things. no rush to check off any box or marker of "true adulthood", comfortable being doted on by his parents even now. every other interview he does, he's like: "well mack and i are just kids" or "it's nice to have someone my age around when all the other guys have families and other responsibilities and adult lives outside of the rink" etc. he's having fun! he's right that he can't really relate to the guys on the team who have kids. he's living in the moment but he's careful about it exactly because he knows that that's what he's trying to do. he's making all these memories and he's taking note and he's going to be nostalgic about a moment just a month ago because well now is the youngest you will ever be again.

versus mack who's kind of always getting spoonfed the "well you're very mature for an eighteen year old" narrative who is mostly careful not to talk about being a kid but still can never escape from it, because, well. he is a kid and it shows. mature in some ways because he left home young and maybe internalized some of the 1oa hockey robot story but childish in other ways, how he waits on those around him to see how he's supposed to react, how it's patently obvious that he just wants to be wanted, even if he doesn't know that that's what it is....!

(THE END OF) BC’S FRESHMAN LINE sources & transcript below the cut

Screenshot of BC vs DU, 2024 Frozen Four Finals // Frozen Four: Boston College loses to Denver in national championship // Gabe Perreault // Ryan Leonard // Fortesa Latifi // Leonard has unfinished business // Gabe Perreault Returning // John Banville // Smith signs with the Sharks // Another Nightmare - The Vaccines // Celebrini, Smith becoming fast friends // Gold and Bones, Friday Pilots Club // the NHL will wait // Samson, Regina Spektor // Smith, Perreault // Leonard, Perreault // Smith, Leonard // BC Line // five more minutes

ID’s are in order of appearance.

(1) Black text on a lilac background, the beginning of Fortesa Latifi’s poem The Truth About Grief. Text reads:

all my grief says the same thing:

this isn’t how it’s supposed to be.

this isn’t how it’s supposed to be.

(2) Screencap of the 2024 Frozen Four Championship match broadcast. The final score reads DENVER 2 - BOSTON COLLEGE 0. The broadcast is zoomed in on Boston College Eagles player Will Smith, who is kneeling on the ice with his helmet cage partially lifted. The chin guard obscures his mouth, he rests his chin on his glove. His hair is dark and stuck to his face from sweat. His eyes, seen through the cage, are red rimmed and haunted.

(3) Photo of Boston College Eagles player Gabe Perreault after BC’s loss to Denver. He stares out at the ice with his stick still in his hands. Captain Eamon Powell’s head can be seen at the bottom of the photo — he is at Perreault’s feet having fallen to his knees after the final whistle.

(4) Photo of Boston College Eagles player Ryan Leonard during the same loss. He is on his knees and curled up with his head bowed on the ice, hidden between his fisted hands, overwhelmed by grief. He looks small against the empty sheet of ice.

(5) Black text on a white background. It is a headline that reads: “Frozen Four: Boston College loses to Denver in national championship”

(6) The end of Latifi’s poem, black text on lilac:

and the world laughs.

holds my hope by the throat.

says:

but this is how it is

(7) Black text on a white background. Headline reads: “Leonard has unfinished business before making jump to NHL with Capitals” subheading reads: “Forward, No. 8 pick in 2023 Draft, focused on Boston College quest for NCAA title this season”

(8) Black text on white. Headline reads: “Boston College Hockey Forward Gabe Perreault Returning For Sophomore Season”

(9) From John Banville’s The Sea. Grey text on pale green. Text reads: “The past beats inside me like a second heart.”

(10) Black text on white. Headline reads: “Smith, No. 4 pick of 2023 NHL Draft, signs with Sharks.”

(11) From Another Nightmare by the Vaccines. Black text on orange. Text reads:

You announced to the stadium that

You knew that you were leaving and you’d never come back

Even for love

It wasn’t enough

(12) Article excerpt: “I think it was time to take the next step,” Smith said. “It’s the best league in the world and you’re getting the best players every single night. That’s definitely something that factored in wanting to make that decision.

“It was a really tough decision because of just how much I love BC and my teammates there,” Smith said. “We had a really special bond. Honestly, before I left for [2024 IIHF World Championship] I’d made up my mind that I was going to sign, but I wanted to make sure I did it at the right time.”

(13) From Gold and Bones by Friday Pilots Club. White text on black. Text reads:

Between feeling alive and feeling fine

But I won’t beg, and I won’t look back

‘Cause somewhere deep I know you want that

(14) Article excerpt: “It doesn’t matter the players that left or the players that come in, our coaching staff is going to put together a team that wants to win a national championship,” said Leonard.

(15) From Samson by Regina Spektor. White text on red. Text reads: I LOVED YOU FIRST, I LOVED YOU FIRST

(16) White text on teal. Headline reads: “Sharks roommates Celebrini, Smith becoming fast friends”

(17) Photo of San Jose Sharks teammates Macklin Celebrini and Will Smith grinning at each other during Sharks Development Camp. Other Sharks prospects mill about around them.

(18) Black text on white. Headline reads: “World Juniors: BC Line of Hagens, Leonard, and Perreault Looking Historic for Team USA”

(19) Article excerpt: Part of the reason that this line has been so impactful for the Americans is that the trio plays together at Boston College, driving the offence for their NCAA squad as well. Hagens was a natural fit with Leonard and Perreault after their former NTDP center Will Smith left BC to turn pro with the San Jose Sharks this season.

(20) From Spektor’s Samson again. White text on red. Text reads: I HAVE TO GO, I HAVE TO GO

(21) Cropped photo of Gabe Perreault (left) and Will Smith (right) during a celly. Smith cradles Perreault’s head as they bump helmets. Smith’s eyes are closed, his mouth is open in a laugh.

(22) Cropped photo of Ryan Leonard (left) and Gabe Perreault (right) during a celly. Their arms are around each other tightly, they smile joyfully. Just visible behind them is the top of Will Smith’s (#6) helmet.

(23) Cropped photo of Ryan Leonard (left) and Will Smith (right) during a celly. Smith has jumped into Leonard, they share a joyful embrace. Smith grins wide and Leonard appears to be mid-yell.

(24) Photo of Ryan Leonard, Gabe Perreault, and Will Smith on the bench during a match. They all lean forward over the boards and have put their heads together, presumably to conspire.

(26) Black text on white. Text reads: “In another universe we had five more minutes”

how sad, how lovely - connie converse

They don't do romance like this anymore.

nick heidfeld didn't post the most nick heidfeld tribute to seb for you lot to be ignoring him